The Hero’s Journey Of A Pick-Up Artist – The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly

Mr. K is a significant figure of the daygame scene initiated in London more than a decade ago, he is a player. He was part of a bunch of geeks who decided to retro-engineer the art of attracting and seducing women in the streets, in pure daylight. These guys didn’t invent the wheel, since the practice of hitting on women in the streets had been extensively practiced for ages I believe. But until the Internet’s era, it was barely documented, and only practiced by isolated men who didn’t have the tools to initiate sub-cultures around their practices.

And that’s exactly what these guys pioneered. It all initially started from the frustration of not getting the sex they wanted. They also had a strong willingness to breakthrough their limiting believes about sexual & social dynamics, shared a huge curiosity for exploring these uncharted territories, and for streamlining processes on how to fuck more women.

And oh boy, men can be so smart when it comes to recognizing patterns, designing and engineering systems to optimize performances and their outcomes. Thanks to Internet, they exchanged tricks online, techniques and detailed reports on all their personal and bold trials and errors from the field, and a common knowledge and skills started to converge. Girl’s behaviors and social dynamic patterns were meta-analyzed, theories around group hierarchies from the animal kingdom, or advanced selling persuasion techniques were dissected to make them actionable in the field, together with deep analysis of female biological instincts. With the one and single ultimate goal: speeding up access to abundant casual sex with many girls. And it eventually started to pay off.

A sub-culture with its strong online communities was born, with men claiming that they had cracked the secret of human seduction leading to great amount of fast sex with women. Which was kind of legit, to some extent. Guys started businesses, designed and implemented new nomadic lifestyles consisting in traveling on all continents for chasing girls while making a living out of it. Internet is such an awesome tool when I think about it, are we really realizing the impact that the information and implementation age has on our culture?

Anyways, Mr. K was part of these pioneers. I have definitely respect for this man. First of all, I have unconditional respect for men with strong warrior archetypes deciding to fully commit on the long run to cold approaching women (i.e., approaching out of the blue women who are complete strangers to you, and with the goal to hit on them with explicit intents).

Practicing cold approaching on a systematic basis is tough and triggers heavy inner fears that one has to face no matter what. Many men trying cold approaches – many – simply give up just after facing the first tiny hurdles, even before they get a chance to really start their journey on this path. Men like Mr. K go beyond their fears, and jump over them. Then, they continue by jumping over higher fences. They have to kill all savage dogs of their inner daemons willing to beat their asses on the way. They cross mine fields and have to destroy thick concrete walls of their past limiting believes and social conditioning, fully embracing the doubt that they might never get there. They are warrior motherfuckers. Mr. K is one of them, a rock-solid warrior motherfucker definitely walking the talk.

Mr. K also took bold actions with entrepreneurship, since he created his own business out of his direct experiences and highly developed skills with women. He’s been selling many self-published books online for years, and has been a daygame coach. Finally, he is definitely a smart ass. Thanks to a systematic bottom-up approach, he collected a lot of field experiences by himself, which were then processed and digested by his strong analytical mind. He also always had the capability to meta-reflect on his findings, and deliver super relevant meta-patterns related to seduction, but also related to men’s growth to some extent. He delivered the outcomes of such a streamlined pipeline, from self-experiments to knowledge and elicitation of meta-techniques, mainly in writing form, in books and blog posts (and to a lesser extent in videos). On top of that, he has strong skills when it comes to clearly articulating his thoughts and opinions on paper.

I have myself read with great attention one of his seminal books about daygame, and half of another one that I couldn’t finish because I saw it too much as a repetition of the previous one. Moreover, even if I was impressed many times by his analytical thinking and his capability to draw relevant conclusions from his field experiences, I sometimes thought he was pushing too hard the brainy arguments just for the sake of it. He definitely knows he is a smart ass, and was sometimes overdoing it. That’s why I never really followed his blog either I believe. Finally, I watched at several occasions in the past some of his online seminar videos and interviews. The same strange feeling kept coming back when I was watching his body language and way of talking. He always seemed to me like a man not at ease with his public speaker persona, like if he always had some tension and unease emanating from his body. I thought it was interesting to notice from a social interactions’ expert.

Several months ago, he published a video about his Hero’s Journey as a player (i.e., as a womanizer), basically summarizing the path he went through for more than a decade, and highlighting the outcomes of his findings on his way.

I thought it was so interesting to get insights about his complete and crazy journey on the pick-up roller-coaster path. Moreover, he relied on this fascinating template of the Hero’s Journey.

The hero’s journey 

The Hero’s Journey is a common template of a broad category of tales and lore, popularized by Joseph Campbell, a great mythologist, in his 1947 book, The Hero with a Thousand Faces. Campbell described the basic narrative pattern as follows: “A hero ventures forth from the world of common day into a region of supernatural wonder: fabulous forces are there encountered and a decisive victory is won: the hero comes back from this mysterious adventure with the power to bestow boons on his fellow man.” He refers to it as a “monomyth” because of its universal and ubiquitous nature, which transcends historical and geographical boundaries.

The Hero’s Journey, consisting in crossing the threshold of the unknown in a death & rebirth process, and giving back the gift of your gold and learnings to the world.

From a psychological and self-realization perspective, crossing the threshold into the unknown consists in exploring your subconscious, and when you hit the rock bottom (death), you start to shed some lights on your inner shadows and darkness, and mine the gold out of it (rebirth). From there you pull out your pristine self and true potential, which can be in turn integrated in your conscious being. Your learnings and deep insights about your journey can then be shared and taught to your fellow men.

Stanislas Grof wrote that Campbell later on demonstrated “how this archetypal sequence is essential for understanding a broad range of phenomena, including shamanic initiatory crises, rites of passage, ancient mysteries of death and rebirth, the great religions of the world, and sociopolitical events”. This archetype has been playing a significant role in the evolution of modern humans, the Homo sapiens.

I thought it was so exciting to see Mr. K mapping his own journey on this template, since I share the idea that mastering daygame, besides the goal and processes to get the amount of casual sex and open relationships I need with women, has been actually a deep inner transformative journey on the long run for me. And Mr. K himself even says that “the pick-up community is actually a self-help community in disguise, you are aiming at seducing women, but ultimately you are seducing yourself”. Which I believe is actually very true since the whole process actually contributes to actively nurturing self-love and self-acceptance, on the path towards self-realization.

Indeed, beyond the tricks, techniques and ‘fake it till you make it’ kind of mindset, my commitment to daygame shed light on a vast territory towards self-discovery and self-acceptance. Exposing myself to daygame has been impacting so much on the way I’ve been perceiving myself and interacting with women with clear sexual intents, unashamed. It made me comprehend the intermingled dance occurring between feminine and masculine polarities, embrace and internalize my strong masculinity that I had been repressed for so long as a Nice Guy. It made me drastically reduce my fears of rejection by realizing that it is not only and always about me and myself. It made me acknowledge my strengths and weaknesses as a man, and work on my inner shadows that were popping up all over the place.

It also made me realize, and internalize, that many women actually didn’t want to fuck me, which turned out to be the opposite of what my childish ego was (semi-)unconsciously strongly denying. By exposing myself to the emotional roller-coaster of practicing daygame on the long run, it’s been making me more aware and resilient of my emotional ups and downs, and increased my acceptance of their impermanence, sometimes also in the darkest moments when hitting the rock bottom of self-doubt. And the experience I gathered by constantly exposing myself to fears and adversity, by constantly challenging the boundaries of my own limiting believes, and by increasing my mental toughness on the long run, has definitely been transformative in many aspects of my life as well, far beyond the realm of seduction.

And that’s why I was so excited to know more about the hero’s journey of a top-notch daygame warrior motherfucker! The more so I am myself still actively on this daygame path.

A genuine look without bullshit

I believe that Mr. K in his video delivers a honest personal perspective of what he went through. He doesn’t hesitate to talk about all the ups and down of his 10 years journey of daygame, fully disclosing some of his darkest moments. Of course, he is also very proud of his achievements (fucked a three-digit number of women, wrote 10 books on the topic and became a successful daygame coach), so I guess it was easier for him to highlight his past vulnerable moments from his current empowered mindset. However, I still respect very much the full disclosure here, and it makes the whole story solid and legit.

That being said, it is also worth noting that by telling his story, Mr. K is also heavily branding himself as a daygame coach, and marketing many of his books that he sells online. Indeed, his whole hero’s journey is actually heavily documented in a huge autobiography consisting of seven books. Yes, you read well, 7 books.

So, before his journey started, Mr. K was on a paycheck with a secured and comfortable job as an office worker. Despite his addiction to video games, his life was apparently perfectly on rails. He was convinced that he was very attractive to women, and had a wife.

But then, the “great man” got suddenly dumped by her. It was a huge and unexpected slap for his false sense of self, and the trigger of what would be an awakening journey. With his strong warrior energy, he dived deep into the unknown depth of underground street women seduction.

And it was a hard pill to swallow boy. He realized how delusional his idealized sense of self actually was. He experienced first-hand how bad he actually was with women. But he systematically exposed himself to the harsh and honest feedback women give you back when you hit on them with direct sexual intents. They are your mirror. They show you right away in your face how a looser you can be. By failing in addressing properly their shit-tests, they dump on you the hard truth that you completely lack of integrity as a man, and that you are not trustworthy because of unclear masculine intents and directions.

When he hit the rock bottom of his journey, Mr. K recruited a coach to initiate his “inner game therapy”. Indeed, he realized that his old idealized sense of self had been actually built up by narcissistic traits. With his coach, he came up with a deeper understanding of the root cause of his narcissism, basically around past defense mechanisms created within his childhood’s psyche in order to cope with low self-esteem. These past defense mechanisms, which were still unconsciously in action in his adult self, contributed to build up his fake and idealized sense of self. And therefore, a part of his own journey consisted in shedding light on these shadows, and defuse their dysfunctional and nonconstructive impact on his behaviour, explaining his lack of success at that time, with women.

And from there, Mr. K’s investment on his journey started to pay off, since it got easier and easier for him to bang new girls on a regular basis. He just had to throw himself in the streets of big European cities with his new sense of self, and his top-notch accumulated field experience would simply does its wonder.

Let’s not forget about time investment though

I just want to take a slight step back from Mr. K’s story here for a personal line of thoughts. Indeed, I have noticed that daygamers, either professional ones (i.e., for which daygame is the most important activity in their lives, and who make a living out of it), or those practicing it as a side activity, have sometimes a hard time to frankly disclose how much time they invest in chasing girls in streets (and I have to say that I somehow include myself here to some extent).

Indeed, they usually only focus on the processes and the end results, but never about the number of hours put on the table to get them. And I believe there are several considerations at play here.

One potential factor is related to the fact that men have strong biological imperatives to spread their semen in as many vaginas as possible, and therefore the amount of time spent to chase them becomes irrelevant compared to the satisfaction we get from fulfilling our biological mission.

Another argument, and related to guys making business with daygame, is clearly marketing. Indeed, if we exclude the extreme cases of men being visible at the very top of a hierarchy (e.g., a rock star, or a famous CEO), then, even if you are at the top of your seduction game, and at the peak of your value on the sexual marketplace, the ratio between chasing and fucking girls is still a number game. It means that even with your very best conditions, a lot of women will still not be willing to fuck you, and you will still have to invest a lot of hours in chasing them if what you are looking for is fucking a lot of new girls on a regular basis. And of course, men selling you their products don’t really want you to know that, since from a marketing perspective, the strategy is to make you feel that once your buy their products or coaching services, then pussies will simply come out of the fan, which is complete bullshit of course.

Finally, and maybe to a lesser extent, I believe that men are a bit uncomfortable in disclosing the real amount of efforts they put only to fuck girls. And I can personally relate to this one as well. Indeed, my persona and ego tends to subtly overemphasise my results with women without talking too much about my investments behind the scenes, thus revealing (to people, but also to myself) my mild obsession about fucking women. So, in that respect, I realized recently that it is important to be truthful to myself, and not be shameful about my investment on daygame, or any other means to get access to abundance of sex.

In that respect, sneaky men practicing social circle game are much more in denial of the work they put in pussy chasing since they hit on women in social environments, believing that their main motivation is to actually socialise, when it is actually only about chasing girls, e.g., think about the joke of the night-life industry.

Finally, as a transition back to our main topic here, it is then very worth noting that as a matter of fact, Mr. K put tremendous – tremendous – amount of hours and energy during his 10 years journey to fuck a 3 digit number of women. So brother, bear in mind that if that’s your target destination as well, you will have to invest and adapt your lifestyle accordingly.

Towards transformation and redemption?

So, following and moving forward his transformative process, Mr. K had some great times and experiences. At many occasions, he could relax and pay dividends of his investments and past inner struggles. And it was a great place to be.

At least for a while.

Indeed, it turned out that from now and then, his path got slightly dark again. He had moments during which he became completely obsessed by sex and statistics. Fucking women and focusing on increasing numbers in Excel sheets completely took over his brains and behavior. He caught himself willing to brag a lot about how many crazy amounts of new girls he was fucking, and as he said, by doing that, he was still kind of feeding his narcissistic traits. He was also pressurized by a very competitive environment made of his male friends who were on similar paths, always pushing themselves harder to compare and challenge their results. He admitted he had “good fun” being in this loop though. And I believe him.

But the dark side of the coin kept coming back, the addictive behaviours, and the depression always accompanying them when your short-term gratification pathways have been overstimulated for too long by dopamine peaks. He reached a stage in which he lost completely his sense of direction. Fucking more hot women was not fulfilling anymore, everything became pointless and dry. Was he finally totally broken, he asked himself? He realized that his obsession for women “was not healthy” when he started to feel preliminary symptoms of burn-out, and that his “bachelor kind of lifestyle was not sustainable”.

He had to return to the real world, to the known. And it came to an epiphany when he finally realized and acknowledged that he had fucked enough women. He was done. He could finally relax in the contemplation of his journey’s completion. He could finalize the writing of his long journey’s autobiography as a gift to the world, and finally move on.

Mr. K claims that he went through what he calls a “spiritual change”, which materialized by the fact that the following thoughts were not scary at all anymore for his new, awakened, 40+ year old, self:

  • “Getting a loan”,
  • “Buying a house”,
  • “Having a dog”,
  • “Having few kids”,
  • “Getting married in a monogamous relationship”.

And his next move towards these news goals is now to try out investing himself in a long-term monogamous relationship with a woman. Indeed, he never had the chance in his player’s journey to have a relationship beyond casual sex, as he explained. He was living in such an abundance of girls that when he was being pissed by one, which apparently finally happened every single time, he simply moved on to the next one who was just waiting next door.

Finally, he is now getting himself ready for his potential next life challenge, his potential next hero’s journey: writing fiction books (yes, fiction, you read well, not friction).

Wow. What a story, right!?

The discovery of the modern player archetype

Mr. K is truly a motherfucker warrior, and I have much respect for such focused and dedicated long-term commitment. He constantly had to find out in himself resources and courage not to give up during these 10 fucking years on his path.

Very few men are capable of such dedication. Very few.

Mr. K dived all-in into uncharted waters, and had a glimpse of the dark hydra of his own shadows and obsessions that was dormant deep down there. It is an inevitable obstacle on the hero’s journey. Facing the multiple heads of the hydra below the threshold of your consciousness. It is not negotiable. First, you must acknowledge its presence and significant impact on your daily life. Then you must commit to take full responsibility for taming it. It is a hard and potentially painful work, consisting in taming one by one its many heads. But its heads only constitute the upper parts of the hydra. Deeper can be found the roots of their dysfunctional vitality. And how deep the hero goes towards a potential complete self-discovery and taming of the hydra before coming back to the surface with new insights and clarity, is a critical question as well.

From my perspective, the gold Mr. K is bringing us back from his journey is his contribution to the definition of the “Modern Player Archetype”. Indeed, by creating new meta knowledge and techniques himself, and by exchanging inputs and perspectives online with other players of similar stature, Mr. K has been embodying this new archetype to the fullest. He also heavily documented many aspects of it, and contributed to developing techniques and mindsets in order to train yourself expand the player in you. And very interestingly, he also strongly embodied and documented its dark and dysfunctional sides.

It could be interesting to dedicate a post on such a modern player archetype at a point, but briefly here, and in particular when it comes to daygamers, I myself love the characteristics of this archetype. A player is a free man, curious, centered and relaxed in his embodied masculinity, playful, unashamed by his needs for casual sex, has clear intents when it comes to getting it and show himself fully to women. He operates completely underground, in crowded streets and complete daylight, hunting for naughty girls unconsciously waiting to be taken and opened up by him. He gets access to raw and wild feminine sexual energies under people’s noses, without anybody noticing it. He loves pushing hard for fast casual sex. He lives in a reality full of eccentric adventures and sexual abundance. The modern side of this archetype is nomadic, traveling the world to expand his hunting grounds, while staying connected online with his tribe.

The shadows of this archetype is about pushing hard for obsessive amounts of meaningless sex, without love nor emotional connections. It is also about manipulating women to get big shots of validation from them, or fucking them as a revenge for not getting the love the player needed as a young boy.

And if Mr. K’s overall story can be somehow considered as a hero’s journey brought to a kind of (enlightened) rebirth process, then why not indeed. But in this very case, only exclusively focused on the very narrowed and specific player archetype. Mr. K definitely invested a lot of focused energy to build up his player’s traits, and successfully tamed some of his subconscious issues that were holding him back for being successful with women. And he definitely fucked a lot of hot women thanks to his skills and updated sense of self.

However, I like to think about the hero’s journey at the service of a much more meaningful path, at the service of a higher purpose.

The path leading to self-realization, as an integrated man.

The path at the service of the realisation of the Self archetype, as coined by the psychoanalyst Carl Jung, the archetype that represents the unified unconsciousness and consciousness of an individual, and created through a process known as individuation, in which the various aspects of your personality are integrated as a whole.

And in that respect, Mr. K completely missed the point, bringing us to “The Ugly” part of his journey.

I need to feel inspired buddy

We are all inspired by nice and juicy stories. And Mr. K in his talk is eager to feed us with the single one supposed to highlight the peak of all his crazy experiences from his player’s memory.

The Same Day Lay of a hot cocaine-fueled porn actress.

same day lay is a term coined by the daygamers community when a man sleeps with a girl he has just met for the first time earlier on the very same day. The story goes as follows: Mr. K cold approaches her in Prague. She is hot and turns out to be a porn actress, and a “yes” girl (meaning that Mr. K has actually very little effort to make for creating attraction since she basically already knows after the first 30 secs of their interaction that she wants to fuck him). After some time, she takes the lead and asks him if he wants to snort some cocaine with her. But Mr. K is too scared to take a decision in the moment, and take her phone number instead, so he can run away to feel a bit safer and think about it. They finally meet again later the same day, and end up at her place snorting some powder, watching her porn movies, and fucking.

Ok, it is a good story, I really like it.

But boy, is it the best shot you got after 10 years of professional daygame practice? Yeah, he said his former self wouldn’t even think about having such experiences at all. I believe him for sure. But there’s no depth nor perspective here. It’s cold, dry, and shallow for the supposed greatest peak story of his sexual life as a player if you ask me. And when he tells it from the video, I can feel his little inner boy proudly getting external validation from the audience. 

The Same Day Lay of a hot cocaine-fueled porn actress.

That’s the single success story he chose to tell for inspiring young men to initiate their own journey in daygame. And because “sadly, he didn’t succeed in having a threesome” as he says. Oh, what a poor little boy who didn’t get his threesome. How you gonna handle such a failure on your deathbed kiddo, now that you are retiring from the daygame business?

But the story doesn’t end here. Later on, the girl takes the lead again (yes, she’s the one leading here) and ask him to join a party with all her porn female friends. And you know what Mr. K thinks about it?

Ah no, I don’t want to get involved in a gang bang with disgusting porn stars”.

Wow. Fuck me. This makes me sad. And angry.

The only interest of Mr. K here lied in the fact that he wanted a “hot cocaine-fueled pussy” on top of his little black book. But the moment she turned her back after delivering, he just peed on her because she’s actually a disgusting being. Oh boy, this is something. The complete opposite of love I believe.

And men slut-shaming women are simply expressing their inner little boys, super scared of strong women empowered by their wild sexuality.

This is ugly.

Not to mention that Mr. K declined an invitation that might have turned out to be an insightful and beautiful experience, maybe even to have learnt something about himself, who knows. But it would have required going through resistance of deepest fears, and showing up with trust, love, and openness.

Unbalanced archetypal energies

As we explained above, Mr. K used the momentum created by his journey mainly to develop the traits of his player archetype. And he clearly over trained it, and over exposed himself to its predilection environment. Indeed, a path towards self-realization requires a subtle balance between different personality traits, lines of behaviours and actions, and emotions. And one has to find out for himself such a balance in order to get in touch with his mature and integrated sense of self. Otherwise, just picture a body builder who would be training like crazy only his right leg, seems functional to you?

The King, Warrior, Magician, and Lover archetypes are a good framework to talk about the mature masculine. It has been developed by the Jungian psychologist Robert Moore and mythologist Douglas Gillette in the 90’s. They argued that masculinity is made up of four main archetypal male energies which serve different purposes. I don’t want to explain this framework here, there is plenty of great documentation online about them, so look it up if you’re interested (the series of articles on the artofmanliness blog is a great entry point).

Warrior – Mr. K has definitely taped into his powerful warrior archetype throughout his journey: strong focus and dedication to his mission, skilful, aggressive, emotionally detached, confronting his fears.

But he clearly lacked a sense of purpose to figure out where his path was heading.

WHY was he on this very journey?

Why?

Spending tremendous amount of resources on any endeavor without asking yourself this question is critical. If what you are doing is not meaningful to you at some deep level of your being, expect the whole thing to backfire hard on you at a point. Not to mention the negative impact your actions can have on your environment along the way.

I believe the main reason that pushed Mr. K to pursue his quest was to fuck a high number of women.

And hold on a second. Why not?

Indeed, at biological level, men have been designed from an evolutionary perspective to spread their genes in as many vaginas as possible. And we could hypothesise that nature came up with a mechanism reducing the drive for a man to fuck new women once his “biological mission” is kind of fulfilled? As of today, I don’t have a strong opinion on that and don’t really know if this idea makes sense of not. However, even if this hypothesis could be partially true, we are complex beings operating with advanced human consciousness, and we definitely need higher sense of purpose and meaning to align our core selves with. And along his journey, Mr. K also felt very strongly that what he was doing at a point didn’t make sense to him at all. This is also sadly confirmed by the fact that all his core issues around addiction, depression and narcissism were not solved at all during his journey (more on that later). I can think about several higher level purposes anchored to the need of fucking a lot of women, e.g., as a spiritual practice with the goal to experience altered states of consciousness thanks to wild feminine sexual energies; for a man willing to provide the gift of his loving cock to many women; as a sex worker providing great sexual services to women too stressed out by their busy lives, or stuck in sexual boredom; for sexual healing of past traumas. But Mr. K’s wants were very far away from any of these options for sure.

Lover – Mr. K has clearly a dysfunctional lover archetype. He gives me the impression to be extremely detached from his emotions, and not empathetic about people at all. When pushing super hard for sex is not enjoyable anymore, then one needs to tap into his lover’s energy to check-in, and do more of what he loves instead. Something that Mr. K was never able to do consciously, but only when his body started to send him red flags with upcoming burn-out symptoms.

I believe Mr. K also embodies a strong shadow of the lover called the “addicted lover”, a man possessed by it is “eternally restless”, i.e., forever searching for experiences that will make him feel truly alive. But since he doesn’t know at a deep level what he is really seeking for himself, then he endlessly look around like a crazy dog for unfulfilling new experiences.

Magician – Mr. K has definitely a strong magician archetype, master of technologies (the player’s ones in his case), eager to learn and create new knowledge, extremely logical and reflective, and willing to teach his follow men how to become good with women. He does it by sharing transparently everything he knows about this topic and his journey, even its darkest parts.

Strong and powerful stuff here for sure.

That being said, I believe Mr. K has a bit of an immature side within his magician as well, the “Know-It-All Trickster”, via a sense of superiority, he feels compelled to prove and show-off in various ways, and manifests the need to brag.

King – I don’t recognize any strong king traits in Mr. K. Indeed, he is not centred and doesn’t live in integrity with himself since the completeness of his journey was actually strongly marked by the same suffering cycles of addiction and depression than from his former self (more on that later).

Moreover, the king, from an archetypal perspective, doesn’t need any external validation since he owns his powers and is self-validated.

However, Mr. K’s journey has been so much fuelled by a childish seek for external validation, which I believe was actually, and sadly, his main motivation to fuck such a high number of women.

Picture the strong ego-boost the super hero gets in his body the very moment he comes back like a victorious warrior to his peers from his tough journey. He is brandishing so proudly in his right hand a big trophy shaped like a big cock, with so many notches on it, each of them corresponding to a pussy he fucked. In his left hand, a special medal of honour for the hot cocaine-fuelled one. Oh fuck yeah, even when writing these lines I can feel myself how yummy this feeling is, sooo deliciooous.

What’s the problem though?

First, such a scene only makes sense in the playground of a primary school. Second, it is a very strong feel-good feeling, but also very short-lived, so after its peak has passed, the super hero wants more. But thanks god, the super hero has now all the tools and skills to continue fucking more new women and get validated by them. Even better, on top of that, the super hero can also rely on Internet to provide him his regular big shots of ego-boost and short-term gratification via online validation from his peers, so he is never short in supply. Until his body can’t handle it anymore at least.

There is also a big co-factor at play for professional gamers since most of them also want to show off online in order to impress their (childish) customers, and push the latter to buy their products. Good old marketing stuff. And among many others of these professionals, Mr. K is for instance a big fan of the “flag counter”, a stupid metric invented by the seduction industry consisting in counting the total number of pussies fucked and sorted out by citizenships. A high number is supposed to show your credentials as a player in being able to escalate for casual sex by navigating in different social environments. Yep. Again, little boys showing off on the playground with their little flags. Cute in boys for sure. Ugly in men though. And I wouldn’t be surprised at all if many of those gamers had actually to force themselves to fuck horses in order to get some of their flags.

Another identity crisis is coming up

Unfortunately, despite all his impressive efforts to go and navigate through his 10 year journey, Mr. K is still a complete messed-up man. Indeed, the rebirth process of the hero’s journey towards self-realization is supposed to lead you to a clear sense of life purpose and connection to your core and pristine self, and in consequence leading you to enhanced consciousness and well-being.

However, how Mr. K figured out that he was finally done with his player’s journey?

  • A lack of purpose in his mission!
  • The dysfunctional and unconscious hydra of addiction and depression creeping in again and again!
  • His body being at the verge of a burn-out!

And in consequence, a lot of still unresolved, unconscious and dysfunctional motives behind the scenes.

At the end of his journey, Mr. K successfully built up a new sense of self, indeed. A strong player identity. And I agree with the fact that it is a much better place to be than his former beta self, completely delusional about women. On his way, he addressed successfully some of his subconscious limiting believes, which made him closer to the mature man he wishes to become. But sadly, he didn’t use the momentum initiated by his journey to dig deeper within himself, to dare looking at the root cause of his addiction patterns, to be curious and explore the immersed part of his narcissism’s iceberg.

Moreover, Mr. K still is completely delusional. He might think he took care of his limiting believes anchored to his narcissism, but he is now pushing himself hard to finalise the writing of his 7th book documenting his whole hero’s journey. Fuck me. Seriously? Do you think boy that your story is that important, and that your inner boiling fire coming from your body for documenting all its very details is really something you need to do in order to feel deeply fulfilled? This simply goes too far for me to really comprehend it. It tells so much about the tremendous negative impact dysfunctional and unconscious behavior can have in a man’s life. There is no depth in such behaviour, no reliability, no grounding, and it’s leading nowhere.

On the other hand, it fascinates me since I want to figure out how to help men avoiding such mistakes as well, since it goes against their growth.

And some more delusion.

Mr. K dares using the wording “spiritual change” (!) to refer to his new perspective about life, which goes as follows. Mr. K’s former self was wishing 10 years ago for: (1) getting a loan, (2) buying a house, (3) having a dog, (4) having few kids, (5) and getting married in a monogamous relationship.

And what the new, upgraded, Mr. K’s self is now wishing for? (1) Getting a loan, (2) buying a house, (3) having a dog, (4) having few kids, (5) and getting married in a monogamous relationship.

Mmm. Let’s have a deeper look at this fact here.

Actually, I don’t really see an issue in wishing for the exact same lifestyle before and after the hero’s journey, since if your new insights about yourself and your purpose have been successfully internalised and integrated in a new and enhanced consciousness, then it’s perfectly legit. Indeed, in that case, thanks to your new sense of self and being, you operate and interact with your surrounding reality from a deeper perspective, and your emotions and actions are embodided and fully aligned with your well-balanced, and mature, masculine archetypal energies.

However, we already discussed the fact that Mr. K failed in going deep enough in his subconscious to have found his true self. And therefore, I believe it is very unlikely that he deeply knows in his current embodied self if coming back to his former lifestyle is really what he needs for himself.

On top of that, it turns out that he is now completely unprepared and unequipped to address this new challenge of deepening a relationship with a woman. Indeed:

  • He hasn’t invested any time nor emotions in a single long-term relationship in his last 10 years, i.e., since his dysfunctional monogamous marriage with his ex-wife ended,
  • His lover archetype is completely fucked-up,
  • He seems to be emotionally shut down,
  • He completely missed the opportunity to try out if long-term open relationships could be aligned with his deepest needs.

From my perspective, this last point is such a missed opportunity. He had so much abundance in terms of women during 10 years. If he had invested a tiny bit less time on this single and only shallow (and shadow) mission to fuck more and more new pussies, but invested a tiny more of it on the exploration of potential long-term open relationships (while continuing in parallel his hunting for fast casual sex, since the two paths are not mutually exclusive at all), he would have learnt so much more about relationships, and ultimately about himself on the way as well.

Finally, just a personal thought I had here when Mr. K mentioned the highly competitive environment of his male friends pushing themselves hard to add up the pussies. I believe that competition is very healthy to some extent of course, but I am pretty sure it ran completely out of the roof with these guys. But instead of competing, it would have been SO interesting to explore cooperation, i.e., sharing lovers. Not that easy to implement for sure, requiring strong awareness from both men and women involved to avoid drama for sure, but interesting as an experiment.

So, Mr. K’s new path, at least when it comes to relationships with women, is now leading nowhere again. His willingness to come back to his former lifestyle is not anchored to a deeper purpose. He is completely unequipped, and has still a lot of new knowledge and skills to learn and internalise when it comes to personally thriving on long-term, emotionally-invested, relationships with women. Not to mention the issue of willing to come back to strict monogamy.

But it is a common pattern of thinking in hardcore players apparently, believing that chasing fast casual sex, and investing on long-term, emotionally-invested, relationships with women are mutually exclusive!

And finally, the pressure of addiction, depression, narcissism, and lack of awareness about his own limitations will pop up again sooner or later.

It is unfortunately completely predictable.

So, what’s next?

I really and genuinely hope that Mr. K will continue his inner journey towards self-realization, and towards continuous exploration of his personal growth. There is a lot of gold in this man, and tremendous constructive energy that could do wonder if properly channeled towards his deeper purpose.

However, I see a risk here.

The risk for him to finally believe that his addiction and depressive patterns would never get sorted out, would always hold him back, and prevent him to find out long-lasting peace of mind by living in harmony within his true self and being.

And indeed, the risk is that after having invested so much of his warrior energy without meaningful directions, and finally too tired of struggling, he finally decides to give up, and end up living with a loan, in a house, with a dog, with few kids, and with a wife in a monogamous relationship that he doesn’t really desire deep inside himself. And this is unfulfilled potential and missed opportunities, from now on, and potentially all the way to his death.

At his personal level, maybe the real gold that Mr. K brought back from his player’s journey is to have finally realised that he loves writing novels, and that he could be a great fiction storyteller. As he himself mentioned at the end of his talk, that’s a potential direction he would like to explore. I hope he’s gonna put all his strengths for exploring this new endeavour, and not at the service of his narcissism or external validation this time, but as a genuine gift to the world. And hopefully, by eventually investing more of his precious time on things he really loves, he will build up a strong functional lover archetype as well, and would finally find the inner resources to address the unconscious root causes of his suffering, in a soft, compassionate, and caring way.

I wish you good luck brother on the continuation of your journey.

However, on a final note, and as I already mentioned in a previous post, I cannot help thinking about the negative impact at our Internet era of widely and quickly spread knowledge that influential people with lack of purpose and self-awareness, and lack of maturity, can have on young men. Indeed, I am pretty sure that Mr. K is currently a role model for many men impressed by his achievements with women, therefore pushing themselves like crazy to potentially get similar results, and without filtering his inputs or challenging his inner motivations. Maybe, maybe not.

And that being said, it is also very worth noting again that the knowledge and strong field experiences Mr. K brought us back thanks to following his dark obsessions has also great positive impacts on men working on themselves, myself included. So, yes, there is definitely always some gold that can be extracted from darkness indeed. And that’s actually the ultimate drive for Creation.

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